Why “Love me Hate me, Just Don’t Ignore me” Doesn’t Work for Moi

Jim Uncategorized Leave a Comment

When I teach marketing to authors and business clients, I often cite the old marketing truth, “Love me, hate me, just don’t ignore me.”

Simply put, when readers or shoppers love you, it’s good, you’re getting noticed. When they hate you, it’s good, you’re getting noticed.

It’s the “Eh, whatever …” attitude that will kill a business or an author’s career.

An Example From My Life

Rooms Cover Final for email sig

When my first novel, ROOMS came out in the spring of 2010, we gave it away free for two weeks on Kindle. Turned out a lot of atheists saw the book and downloaded it but didn’t bother to read the description.

By and large they hated the novel because it had God in it. And they were vocal. To the tune of 89 one star reviews on Amazon. Even some believers hated it. I understand. It’s not a story for everyone. But 198 people loved it. And I believe that’s part of why it’s been my biggest selling book so far.

ROOMS rating for 3 Men

Why Love Me, Hate Me Doesn’t Work for Me

It worked for ROOMS, so why am I saying it doesn’t? WARNING: Vulnerable moment coming: It’s because I want to be liked by everyone. The one star ratings? They sting.

The other day, Darci said, “You tell people, ‘love me, hate me, just don’t ignore me’, but you don’t live it.

Ugh. She’s right. (Don’t you love it when your spouse speaks truth?)

If there are fifteen people in a room and one of them doesn’t like me, I’m worried about that person. What a trap to get caught in. It’s a thick chain that holds me back.

The good news is I’m learning that when Jesus says we have to hate our spouses, our children, our friends in comparison to him, he wasn’t just saying it to underscore the necessary first priority of our lives (Him). He says it to set us free.

When He is our validation, when we realize how deeply He sings over us with delight, then the likes or dislikes of the people around us melt away.

He is freedom. He is Life. And in those moments when we realize the truth of that, it’s like super-nova light that makes everything else go dark by comparison.

Let us push into that Light, friends, more often than we ever have before.

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